One of the things that I do a lot more of these days is online shop. I think this is true of all of us, but I'm pretty sure motherhood has increased my online (and concurrently decreased my in-person) shopping activities to the extreme. I mean, that Amazon app on my phone is amazing. Three clicks and anything I could ever want is on its way to my house in less than 48 hours! I can't even begin to tell you all the things I ordered at 3 a.m. when I was nursing tiny Dash all through the night. These days, at least my shopping is limited to normal awake hours, but I can sure do a lot of damage in that time.
My fears that I maybe do too much online shopping were realized earlier this week. I was walking Ella home from school, and we were about a mile from our house. I was wearing a hat and sunglasses (totally incognito, right?) when the UPS truck came rumbling down the road. Instead of speeding by, the truck slowed down and the driver leaned out to say hello. As he drove off, he said "I'll see you later today!" If your UPS driver knows you a mile from your house, he visits you a little too often.
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Overheard
Ella: "Daddy, let's play a game where you are a slave and have to work all day and you ask me to go do something like see your family and I say 'No no no! I will not let them go' "
In case this sounds extra crazy to you, I should note that Ella has been learning about the Passover story at school this week and an integral part is when the Pharaoh refuses to let Moses and his people go.
At last week's family Shabbat at her preschool, I found the room full of preschoolers shaking their fingers at the teachers and yelling "No no no!" as they acted out the Passover story in song pretty hilarious. Perhaps the teachers think it is less funny than I do, especially if they try that in non-Passover situations.
In case this sounds extra crazy to you, I should note that Ella has been learning about the Passover story at school this week and an integral part is when the Pharaoh refuses to let Moses and his people go.
At last week's family Shabbat at her preschool, I found the room full of preschoolers shaking their fingers at the teachers and yelling "No no no!" as they acted out the Passover story in song pretty hilarious. Perhaps the teachers think it is less funny than I do, especially if they try that in non-Passover situations.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Pre-dinner silence
On a particularly crummy late afternoon recently (remember my great misery during the pre-dinner hour?), I discovered the secret to TOTAL SILENCE while I'm cooking dinner. I'm not proud of the solution but on a day when the whining was just too much and my patience was just too little, I was desperate. Desperate enough to turn on the kitchen television (usually used only for Josh to catch up on SportsCenter while he does dishes) and scan the channels frantically for something to capture their attention. The solution was not Sesame Street or Dora the Explorer or anything else kid-focused. Nope, for my two little ones, the Food Network is where it's at. There was 20 minutes of total silence while both Ella and Dash watched someone else chop and chatter (never mind that I'm usually doing the very same thing, live, in front of them).
This is not actually a new tactic in my parenting playbook. Back when Ella was a toddler, at the end of the day, we would often watch Food Network together while I made dinner. In those days, the 5:00 pm line-up was Ina Garten followed by Giada, two Food Network chefs I actually enjoy watching. In fact, by age 17 months, one of Ella's words was "Ina", and she had mastered "Ada" by 19 months (I just checked her baby book to confirm). These days, the 5:00 hour is the Paula Deen hour. I cannot stand Paula Deen, but it turns out I can tune her out much better than I can the whining and screeching of my own two kids.
Riveted
This is not actually a new tactic in my parenting playbook. Back when Ella was a toddler, at the end of the day, we would often watch Food Network together while I made dinner. In those days, the 5:00 pm line-up was Ina Garten followed by Giada, two Food Network chefs I actually enjoy watching. In fact, by age 17 months, one of Ella's words was "Ina", and she had mastered "Ada" by 19 months (I just checked her baby book to confirm). These days, the 5:00 hour is the Paula Deen hour. I cannot stand Paula Deen, but it turns out I can tune her out much better than I can the whining and screeching of my own two kids.
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
He found the art table
Remember my post about the Art Table? We're going to have to stop calling it "Ella's Art Table" and start putting away the glue, the scissors, and basically everything else she finds fun about it these days because her little bro has found the art table. He makes a beeline for it whenever he can. So far his favorite thing is the crayons but that's only because we haven't let him at the playdoh yet.
Mulch mountain
Time versus money is a conversation we have a lot lately. Some things that we used to do ourselves (clean the house, mow the lawn, weed the garden) seem better left to the professionals these days. In that spirit, I asked our gardener for a quote to spread mulch over all of our gardens. Now before you think we are really big wimps - I mean, who can't spread out a few bags of mulch? - you need to know that we have really really big gardens. We bought our house from a couple who had invested a great deal of time, money, and true love of plants in our yard. Did I mention that their children were grown and long gone from the nest? Enter us, moving in with a three-month old and proceeding to spend the next three years finishing a PhD, building a business career, and having another baby. Guess how much time was left for gardening? After a few years of getting by with some minor weeding, we realized that our beautiful yard was getting away from us and that we needed to get some help in taming the wild. I should say that my own mother is the most expert of garden experts and routinely spends the children's nap times saving plants from certain death due to our ignore-it-all gardening strategy, planting vegetable patches, and generally just making things look and grow so much nicer. But our garden would be a full-time job for her, and she already has her own lovely gardens to work in. Enter F, our gardener, who has indeed helped us immensely in getting the gardens back under control and back to being a place we like to be.
So I asked F for a quote to mulch all of the gardens which needed to be done desperately and he gave us a bid that while reasonable, was just a lot of money, understandably since he estimated that he and his crew had to spread mulch on 2000 square feet of gardens.
I thought this mighty sum was mighty worth it for us to spend the weekends with the kids rather than taking our tiny pick-up truck to the mulch store ten times and unloading it. But Josh decided it was a mighty sum he'd rather put in the bank and, gosh, wouldn't it be nice to work outside in the yard in this lovely spring weather? I agreed that we'd try to do the project ourselves this year and if it was a total disaster, we'd hire it out next year. And thus, two Sundays in March got marked off as Family Garden Days. My parents agreed to help us (and by help, it turns out, they meant supply most of the knowledge, do most of the work, and be much more cheerful about this enormous task than I could ever be).
The biggest obstacle to the entire task, I felt, was what to do with the kids while we worked. Thankfully with my parents to help in the garden, one of us could be with the kids and the other could be in the yard. Ella, however, wanted no part of being stuck inside and instead was awfully enthusiastic about helping. She put on her rain boots, got her little rake, and loaded up mulch in her little bucket which she then loaded into the wheelbarrow. She also helped my dad get an even better workout by insisting that she ride back from each load in his wheelbarrow. Fortunately, he thought this was as much fun as she did.
So I asked F for a quote to mulch all of the gardens which needed to be done desperately and he gave us a bid that while reasonable, was just a lot of money, understandably since he estimated that he and his crew had to spread mulch on 2000 square feet of gardens.
I thought this mighty sum was mighty worth it for us to spend the weekends with the kids rather than taking our tiny pick-up truck to the mulch store ten times and unloading it. But Josh decided it was a mighty sum he'd rather put in the bank and, gosh, wouldn't it be nice to work outside in the yard in this lovely spring weather? I agreed that we'd try to do the project ourselves this year and if it was a total disaster, we'd hire it out next year. And thus, two Sundays in March got marked off as Family Garden Days. My parents agreed to help us (and by help, it turns out, they meant supply most of the knowledge, do most of the work, and be much more cheerful about this enormous task than I could ever be).
Did I mention that the mountain of mulch was HUGE?
Playing in the giant mulch pile before we got down to business.
What IS this stuff and why am I sitting in it?
The biggest obstacle to the entire task, I felt, was what to do with the kids while we worked. Thankfully with my parents to help in the garden, one of us could be with the kids and the other could be in the yard. Ella, however, wanted no part of being stuck inside and instead was awfully enthusiastic about helping. She put on her rain boots, got her little rake, and loaded up mulch in her little bucket which she then loaded into the wheelbarrow. She also helped my dad get an even better workout by insisting that she ride back from each load in his wheelbarrow. Fortunately, he thought this was as much fun as she did.
Biggie's shadow
Truly a stellar grandpa
Dash, doing his thing on the porch while we worked.
After the first scheduled day of Family Garden Fun, I'd say we got 80% of the work done. The mountain in the driveway is now just a small hill and most of the garden spaces at least have small piles of mulch in them, ready to be spread. So we're not done with the project yet but I will concede that it was less miserable and more fun than I had predicted. So money well-saved, Josh. At least til next spring.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Til Saturday
Ella is a mostly really well-behaved child. We had a period around her third birthday where she acted out a little bit so we used a version of time-out called the 'whining wall' where she would be sent to sit against a specific wall in the living room when she needed to pull herself together. After a few months, though, we found we weren't using the whining wall much because she just in a good place with very little behavior we needed to correct.
Recently, she has gotten a little bit more stubborn and a little bit more cheeky so we've had to come up with some new measures of discipline. We've used the threat of 'consequences' to great success (as in, "I will give you one more chance to stop interrupting mommy while she is talking or there will be consequences"). The best part is that we haven't had to actually determine what those consequences might be. This is good because we can't figure out what would actually be a good consequence. What can you take away from three-year old that has any meaning? We rarely eat dessert, she watches very little TV and we hate the idea of taking away something like books which is really her greatest love. So 'consequences' are working great until she gets smart enough to want to know what those consequences are and then we are in trouble.
Our other new tactic is threatening to take a special toy away 'until Saturday'. One of my playgroup mama friends mentioned this idea to me awhile back and in a fit of frustration, I used it recently to major success. I like it because it doesn't involve a really horrible threat (to a kid) like giving away or throwing away a favorite toy, but it does indicate that toys are a privilege for children with good behavior. And apparently Saturday is a LONG way away in Ella's head because she gets very upset at the idea of something going away until Saturday and usually shapes up quickly when we throw down the 'til Saturday' threat.
This past Friday evening, Ella had a tantrum about a minor issue (isn't it always a minor issue?) and as she got more and more hysterical, I got more and more frustrated with her. I could hear our argument dragging on and I knew I had to do something to cut it off. So I told her that if she didn't calm down, I was going to put away her little pegs (a much beloved toy) until Saturday. For a moment, the hysteria increased as she expressed her extreme displeasure about losing her pegs for such a terribly long time, but, to her credit, she pulled herself together in short order and the tantrum was over.
The funniest part? We learned that despite Ella very clearly knowing the days of the week, the 'til Saturday' threat is still extremely effective when laid down on Friday night.
Recently, she has gotten a little bit more stubborn and a little bit more cheeky so we've had to come up with some new measures of discipline. We've used the threat of 'consequences' to great success (as in, "I will give you one more chance to stop interrupting mommy while she is talking or there will be consequences"). The best part is that we haven't had to actually determine what those consequences might be. This is good because we can't figure out what would actually be a good consequence. What can you take away from three-year old that has any meaning? We rarely eat dessert, she watches very little TV and we hate the idea of taking away something like books which is really her greatest love. So 'consequences' are working great until she gets smart enough to want to know what those consequences are and then we are in trouble.
Our other new tactic is threatening to take a special toy away 'until Saturday'. One of my playgroup mama friends mentioned this idea to me awhile back and in a fit of frustration, I used it recently to major success. I like it because it doesn't involve a really horrible threat (to a kid) like giving away or throwing away a favorite toy, but it does indicate that toys are a privilege for children with good behavior. And apparently Saturday is a LONG way away in Ella's head because she gets very upset at the idea of something going away until Saturday and usually shapes up quickly when we throw down the 'til Saturday' threat.
This past Friday evening, Ella had a tantrum about a minor issue (isn't it always a minor issue?) and as she got more and more hysterical, I got more and more frustrated with her. I could hear our argument dragging on and I knew I had to do something to cut it off. So I told her that if she didn't calm down, I was going to put away her little pegs (a much beloved toy) until Saturday. For a moment, the hysteria increased as she expressed her extreme displeasure about losing her pegs for such a terribly long time, but, to her credit, she pulled herself together in short order and the tantrum was over.
The funniest part? We learned that despite Ella very clearly knowing the days of the week, the 'til Saturday' threat is still extremely effective when laid down on Friday night.
Monday, March 5, 2012
This morning I was taking a shower and Ella was going to the bathroom. She sometimes seems to think that the toilet is just a place to sit and chat, and since I was gone over the weekend, she took an extra long time this morning sitting on the potty and talking with me. Out of the blue, we had this conversation:
Ella: But where do babies come out of, Mommy?
Me: Well.... <mumble, think think think, mumble mumble> .... <finally> They come out between the Mommy's legs.
Ella: Well, that means they come out of a mommy's heiny or butt.
Me: Um, yes, well, yes <mumble mumble mumble>, yes, they come out of the mommy's heiny [Side note: Please forgive me, Josh. You are correct that this is the wrong terminology to use, at least according to the Urban Dictionary]
Ella, looking down: I don't think I'm big enough for a baby to come out of there.
Me: That's true. You are just a little girl now but maybe someday when you are grown up you will have a baby of your own.
Ella: Well, MAYBE I'll have a baby. But who will be the daddy?
Me: I hope that you'll meet a man that you love and he can be the daddy.
Ella: But, Mommy! I love you! So maybe my baby can have two mommies. It's good to have two mommies or two daddies.
Me: That's right, because what makes a family, Ella?
Ella: Love.
And there you have it. A totally uncomfortable birds and bees talk followed by the sweetness of my three-year-old's complete understanding that love is what matters in a family. I find it so upsetting that certain closed-minded politicians in the state where we live cannot comprehend a simple truth that my preschooler does. This afternoon we are going to go pick up our yard sign indicating that we are 'Another Family Against the Amendment' in North Carolina. That should yield some awesome Ella conversations on the way home.
Ella: But where do babies come out of, Mommy?
Me: Well.... <mumble, think think think, mumble mumble> .... <finally> They come out between the Mommy's legs.
Ella: Well, that means they come out of a mommy's heiny or butt.
Me: Um, yes, well, yes <mumble mumble mumble>, yes, they come out of the mommy's heiny [Side note: Please forgive me, Josh. You are correct that this is the wrong terminology to use, at least according to the Urban Dictionary]
Ella, looking down: I don't think I'm big enough for a baby to come out of there.
Me: That's true. You are just a little girl now but maybe someday when you are grown up you will have a baby of your own.
Ella: Well, MAYBE I'll have a baby. But who will be the daddy?
Me: I hope that you'll meet a man that you love and he can be the daddy.
Ella: But, Mommy! I love you! So maybe my baby can have two mommies. It's good to have two mommies or two daddies.
Me: That's right, because what makes a family, Ella?
Ella: Love.
And there you have it. A totally uncomfortable birds and bees talk followed by the sweetness of my three-year-old's complete understanding that love is what matters in a family. I find it so upsetting that certain closed-minded politicians in the state where we live cannot comprehend a simple truth that my preschooler does. This afternoon we are going to go pick up our yard sign indicating that we are 'Another Family Against the Amendment' in North Carolina. That should yield some awesome Ella conversations on the way home.
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